The most relevant trends and data to help you find the best accredited music therapy programs. Insight on students, faculty and music therapy professional salaries.
Lots of good stats here! However, the American Music Therapy Association lists 75 universities offering music therapy degrees, all mapped out here.
It’s absurd how daunting and confusing this first stage of finding a therapist can seem, especially when it’s likely that part of the reason you’re seeking therapy is that you’re feeling overwhelmed. Hopefully, this guide can help: A Beginner’s Guide To Starting Therapy
My dysmorphia is absolutely terrible tonight. Trying to figure out how to handle it. And tips?
"I was just diagnosed as a body dysmorphic, and it makes me realize why I relate to Elsa - I literally keep myself shut away from the world because I fear what people will think of me. Seeing her embrace who she really is is helping my recovery, as is watching the other princess films, as it’s about who you are as a person, not what you look like. Elsa, Merida, and Mulan are really helping me out"
Violence perpetrated on the mentally ill shows that victim-blaming is nothing more than a cover-up for subhuman behaviour
Some years ago, the Mufti of Australia got into hot water when he likened women who failed to wear the hijab to “uncovered meat”, at risk of being devoured by cats. In other words, if a woman who dressed “immodestly” were to be raped then she should share, if not take all, the blame.
Sadly, despite the outcry that followed, this attitude – that of blaming the victim – is still deeply prevalent. It should be obvious, but it apparently needs stating over and over: the criminal is the offender. That is, in a rape, the rapist is at fault. No argument.
Women, for example, do not just “get raped”. Somebody has to actively perform an unwelcome act. There is no place for blaming a victim for wearing the “wrong” clothes: if you do, you justify the action. Not to mention that there is no evidence that wearing so-called provocative clothing has anything to do with whether or not someone is likely to rape someone else. Neither is being intoxicated an invitation to rape (because cultures where alcohol is banned and women must be covered up don’t have a problem with rape, right?).
It is worth repeating here that the major motive for most rapes is not sexual attraction, but power. And rapes tend not to be spur-of-the-moment: most rapes are pre-meditated, and only about 8% of rapes are perpetrated by strangers.
More than this, if you blame the victim – by saying she is like a plate of uncovered meat, say – you also remove agency from the offender. Saying “She was asking for it” is simply an abdication of responsibility: it makes you into a simpleton with no control over your actions. An animal perhaps – a feral animal who should maybe be treated like one. It’s also pretty bloody insulting to most men to imply that they are helpless animals with no self-control, but that’s by the by.
To follow victim-blaming logic, you would argue that if someone (and it doesn’t have to be necessarily a woman) does anything that is slightly outside a cultural norm then it is their own fault if someone rapes or otherwise abuses them. If that logic doesn’t immediately sound perverse to you, perhaps it would help to think of an example. Shall we consider mental illness?
There is still a stigma against mental illness. It’s a broad term covering many conditions, and it is still majorly misunderstood. You just have to look at other recent events to realise this. People suffering from severe mental illness are often stigmatised, feared even, because of the public misperception of (for example) schizophrenics as violent. But you can’t help suffering from mental illness, and you can’t always be cured of it.
Would we blame a woman who suffered from schizophrenia if someone raped her? Would we attribute the rape to her illness, and say she should have taken steps to prevent it?
A study by researchers at University College and Kings College London, published today in Psychological Medicine, reports that of women with severe mental illness surveyed for the study, 40% had been the victims of rape or attempted rape.* This compares with 7% of the general population (the figures for men are no less remarkable, although lower overall: 12% of men with severe mental illness had been seriously sexually assaulted, versus 0.5% in the general population).
“the reality for patients is that they are at increased risk of being victims of some of the most damaging types of violence.”
– Professor Louise Howard, Kings College London
Somebody seriously sexually abuses nearly one in every two women with severe mental illness. Although this is an association rather than a proof of causation, the study makes it clear that the illnesses being treated could not all be caused by the abuse: all participating patients had been treated for at least a year and 10% had experienced sexual assault within the past year at the time of the survey. So it looks that for at least some (and I’d wager most) of the victims, the assault would not have happened if they had not been suffering from mental illness.
Nearly half of the sexual abuse of women was classified as “domestic”, that is carried out by a partner or other family member. So again, this isn’t opportunistic rape, not a case of seeing someone “asking for it” and acting upon that notion; this is abuse by a (probably trusted) family member who is more than likely aware of the victim’s vulnerability, and who deliberately takes advantage of it.
Would you say that it is the victim’s fault for having schizophrenia that somebody abused them? Would you say that the 12% of men in the survey who were sexually abused should have done something to prevent it? Were they “asking for it”?
No? Why then say women should cover up, or not drink, or stay inside, or not take raunchy photographs of themselves with their partner? Is it simply that people with mental illness don’t have a choice, but that women do have control over their dress and their alcohol intake. If that’s what you think, then take a moment to consider what that says about you. (Hint: it’s nothing complimentary).
So why blame a woman when someone rapes or otherwise treats them like an item of property?
Shall we take the victim-blaming argument to its logical conclusion and simply say, if you don’t want to be raped, don’t be a woman?
The civil thing to do is to say no; the perpetrator of the hack; the viewer of the photographs; or the apologist for the rapist: they are the ones who poison society like a cancer, and who deserve to be publicly shamed.
Do You Love Someone With Depression?
If you have a partner or are close to someone who struggles with depression, you may not always know how to show them you love them. One day they may seem fine, and the next they are sad, distant and may push you away. It is important that you know that as a person who is close to them and trusted by them, you can help your friend or partner have shorter, less severe bouts of depression. Mental illness is as real as physical illness (it is physical actually, read more about that here) and your partner needs you as much as they would need to be cared for if they had the flu.
Your relationship may seem one-sided during these times, but by helping your partner through a very difficult and painful affliction, you are strengthening your relationship and their mental health in the long term.
1. Help them keep clutter at bay.
When a person begins spiraling into depression, they may feel like they are slowing down while the world around them speeds up. The mail may end up in stacks, dishes can pile up in the sink, laundry may go undone as the depressed person begins to feel more and more overwhelmed by their daily routine and unable to keep up. By giving your partner some extra help sorting mail, washing dishes or using paper plates and keeping chaos in check in general, you’ll be giving them (and yourself) the gift of a calm environment. (I’m a fan of the minimalist movement because of this, you can read more about that here.)
2. Fix them a healthy meal.
Your partner may do one of two things when they are in a depressed state. They may eat very little, or they may overeat. In either case, they may find that driving through a fast food restaurant or ordering a pizza online is just easier than fixing a meal. Eating like this, or neglecting to eat will only degrade your partner’s health, causing them to go deeper into their depression. Help your loved one keep their body healthy, and their mind will follow. This is a great article that talks about the “Brain Diet” which can help the symptoms of depression, and this article talks about how our modern diet could contribute to the recent rise in depression. Here is a recipe for a trail mix that is quick to make and has mood-boosting properties.
3.Get them outside.
The benefits of getting outside for a depressed person are huge. And it is possibly the last thing on earth your partner will want to do. Take them to be somewhere in nature. Pack a picnic and lie in the sun, take a leisurely hike or plant a garden. Being barefoot in the dirt, or “earthing” helps ground the body and reverse the effects of living in a world of emf’s, and digging in soil can actually act as an antidepressant, as a strain of bacterium in soil, Mycobacterium vaccae, triggers the release of seratonin, which in turn elevates mood and decreases anxiety. Sunshine increases Vitamin D production which can help alleviate depression. My friend Elizabeth wrote an excellent post about Vitamin D and its link to depression here. For more information about other sources of Vitamin D, this is a great post as well as this.
4. Ask them to help you understand what they’re feeling.
If your partner is able to articulate what they are going through, it will help them and you better understand what you are dealing with, and may give insight into a plan of action for helping your partner. Also, feeling alone is common for a depressed person and anything that combats that feeling will help alleviate the severity and length of the depression.
5. Encourage them to focus on self-care.
Depressed people often stop taking care of themselves. Showering, getting haircuts, going to the doctor or dentist, it’s all just too hard, and they don’t deserve to be well taken care of anyway in their minds. This can snowball quickly into greater feelings of worthlessness since “Now I’m such a mess, no one could ever love me”. Help your loved one by being proactive. Tell them “I’m going to do the dishes, why don’t you go enjoy a bubble bath?” can give them the permission they won’t give themselves to do something normal, healthy and self-loving.
6. Hug them.
Studies show that a sincere hug that lasts longer than 20 seconds can release feel-good chemicals in the brain and elevate the mood of the giver and receiver. Depressed people often don’t want to be touched, but a sincere hug with no expectation of anything further can give your partner a lift.
7. Laugh with them.
Telling a silly joke, watching a comedy or seeing a stand up comedian will encourage your partner to laugh in spite of themselves. Laughing releases endorphins and studies show can actually counteract symptoms of depression and anxiety.
8. Reassure them that you can handle their feelings.
Your partner may be feeling worthless, angry and even guilty while they are depressed. They may be afraid that they will end up alone because no one will put up with their episodes forever. Reassure them that you are in the relationship for the long haul and they won’t scare you away because they have an illness.
9. Challenge their destructive thoughts.
A depressed person’s mind can be a never-ending loop of painful, destructive thoughts. “I’m unlovable, I’m a failure, I’m ugly, I’m stupid”. Challenge these untruths with the truth. “You’re not unlovable, I love you. You aren’t a failure, here are all the things you’ve accomplished.”
10.Remind them why you love them.
Look at pictures of happy times you’ve had together. Tell them your favorite things about them. Reminisce about your relationship and all the positive things that have happened, and remind your partner that you love them and they will get through this.
(via The Darling Bakers)
More people need to know this.This is so incredibly important. I’ve seen people with depression ostracized so many times, and I cannot stress how much it means to each and every person I’ve tried to reach out to after whatever “falling-outs” they’ve had due to depression. Remember to always be compassionate and kind to all friends like this, because you never know what they’re going through.
So. I had no idea about this app until I went into my doctor and he told me about it.
LISTEN UP. THIS APP. THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SERIOUSLY A BLESSING. ESPECIALLY TO ANYONE WITH FINANCIAL PROBLEMS (which is kind of everyone now). THIS IS NOT INSURANCE THOUGH. BUT IT WILL HELP YOU OUT. DOWNLOAD THIS APP RIGHT NOW. NO. STOP READING. DOWNLOAD IT.
This app allows you to input the prescription you have, select your dose, and then find a place near you (or your own pharmacy) with the cheapest price. Then you click “get code/coupon/discount card,” show that to the pharmacist, and THERE YOU GO. SAVING YOU SOME CASH TO GET YOURSELF A WELL DESERVED DRINK, CANDY BAR, DATE MONEY, SEX TOY CASH, OR GO BUY YOURSELF A HAMSTER AND NAME HIM STARLORD WITH THE EXTRA MONEY.
No, but in all seriousness. This app is saving my ass right now.
I’m Trans* and have Fibromyalgia, and this is really making a difference already. I hope this helps out other people. We all know it fucking sucks to have to pay this much for the medication we need to function in life.
this really helped me out when i didn’t have insurance. like, being able to spend only $8 on meds that normally would’ve cost me $100+ is incredible.
Using this app has cut my self pay prescription prices in HALF
So I sat at my computer for a long time. And then I was surrounded by hair I’ve been pulling my hair out and I didn’t even notice? So maybe that’s a thing I do? So I might have Trich as a symptom of my OCD? I dunno.
When we begin to tell our histories, it is almost inevitable that we will run across someone who doesn’t believe that what happened to us is sexual trauma.
This post will both cover what to do if someone doesn’t believe you- and how to deal with the possibility of it.
Prepping to tell someone:
- If you’ve already told someone (even if it’s a therapist or someone over the internet)- it can help to talk to them again and reaffirm where you’re at.
- Write down what you want to say/rehearse what you want to say. Occasionally the disbelief isn’t intentional- it’s a ‘what’ in response to confusion and we take it as ‘oh no they don’t believe me and I should never speak up again’ versus ‘I was talking 90 miles an hour and they really had no idea what was said and are just trying to figure it out’
- Know that one person not believing you doesn’t change what happened.
- Practice setting boundaries. Know that you can walk away at any time. You do not have to sit and listen to someone invalidate you.
- Try scoping out how a specific person you want to tell will react. Find out their views on rape. Bring up cases in the news, or plots in books, or ‘a friend of a friend of a friend told me’- whatever it takes for you to feel comfortable and know ‘okay, this person doesn’t automatically assume survivors are liars.’
- Make a plan for what you will do if they say they don’t believe you. Will you try to correct them? What will you say? At what point do you walk away?
- Make a plan for what you will do after you leave the situation. Who will you go to for support? Where will you seek validation? Will you need to manage symptoms?
- Self care. Self soothe. I cannot say this enough.
During the event:
-It’s always a good idea to start out by setting boundaries if you can. Even before some expresses their dis/belief in what you say.
-You are allowed to be like ‘I want to tell you something, and if you choose not to believe me- I really don’t want to hear about it.’
-You are allowed to say, ‘I am going to tell you something, and I don’t want to answer questions about it. It’s hard enough talking about it as is.’
-You are allowed to print off articles and ask them to read it- articles that talk about why it’s harmful to ask ‘how do you know?’ or ‘well if it was really rape/abuse you would have ____’ or ‘why didn’t you _____?’
- If they start asking questions, you are allowed to cut them off and say ‘That is a really inappropriate thing to ask’
- If they start telling you that it wasn’t really trauma- you are allowed to correct them, and you are also allowed to say, ‘what you are saying is hurting me.’
- You are allowed to walk away completely.
After the event:
-Self care. Self soothe. Emotionally vent. Whatever you need to do.
-Talk to other survivors.
-If you have people who already know and believe you, talk to them. You are allowed to reach out to them for validation. You are allowed to say ‘someone just told me that it wasn’t really trauma will you please remind me that it is’
- Know that one person, ten people, half the world thinking that what happened to you wasn’t trauma- doesn’t mean it wasn’t. There will always be people who will argue that the grass is blue. There will be people who have hurt others, and don’t want to admit your trauma- because it means accepting that they hurt others. There will be people who will argue because they think it’s okay to debate other people’s trauma. None of this reflects on you.
- It can help to have a mantra. ‘What happened to me is valid’. ‘What happened to me is real whether or not other people recognize it as so’. ‘No one but me can define my lived experiences’. Whatever you need it to be. Have it written on a sticky note. Have it in your phone or on your mirror.
- It can help to have a folder with articles, or validating posts. Things that remind you that there are plenty of people out here who do believe that what happened to you was trauma and that you have every right to your pain and every right to heal at your own pace.